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Milestones create a two-faceted opportunity – reflecting on how far we have come, and making plans for how far we have yet to go.
This month, Benjamin and I will celebrate eight years of marriage. It seems so long and yet so short.
I don't have a color version of this. Our wedding was shot on FILM.
My daddy, Benjamin, me and my mommy
I have a distinct memory of turning eight years OLD. My sisters and I were playing outside on the swing set. Tabitha was six; Esther was five. I remember telling them, “I am EIGHT years old now. That is REALLY old.” One of them made a comment about how they too would soon be eight. “Yes, but then I will be even OLDER. But eight is VERY old.” I’m not sure why eight was such a significant moment of self-awareness, but maybe this is common at that age.
I was obsessed with layers and Laura Ingalls Wilder. This is my prairie-girl outfit.
So now, I have been married EIGHT years, which is a REALLY long time! However, since eight years is no longer 100% of my life’s experience, it feels like a rather short time.
In eight years, we lived in Tulsa, Oklahoma; Little Rock, Arkansas; Houston, Texas; and San Antonio; Texas. We traveled to visit relatives in Southern California, Minnesota, North Carolina, and Florida. We worked in Costa Rica on short-term missions. We have lived in a quaint old one-bedroom apartment (our first), an army base, a pastor’s back bedroom, a comfortable two-bedroom apartment, my parent’s 12x10 office, and finally, an apartment at the back of my parents’ home that we still rent.
Cooking in our apartment in 2005
In eight years, we have graduated college, completed military service, bought and sold cars, held multiple jobs, changed careers, paid off $48,000 in debt (almost entirely student loans, with a bit of credit card debt and a car loan). Benjamin has been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder and ADHD. Therapy and medication management has noticeably improved his life, and indirectly, mine too.
In Costa Rica on short-term missions, the church we supported served these at a neighborhood outreach. I'm sure it means something different in Spanish.
We have led four different home groups at our church, moved our church between four different buildings, and seen this piece of the body of Christ expand and contract, and train and release. My family has added one marriage and five grandchildren. My baby sisters are both in college. Benjamin’s family has added one grandkid, and his nephew is in so grown up he's in junior high already.
So that’s some of where we’ve been. Plans for where we’re going in the next eight years? Restoring our marriage. Overcoming the destruction caused by years of undiagnosed ADHD. Maybe owning a home, but then again, we don’t really want more debt, or to be tied down. Paying off student loans. Well that might take longer than eight years, but we can hope. Staying active in our church, specifically by multiplying ourselves into other new leaders. Contributing to the number of grandkids in the family.
But the last eight years has been more unexpected than planned, so maybe I shouldn’t plan too hard. It’s an adventure, just like my husband tells me about camping.
