March 11 at 2:16pm near San Antonio
What day is it today?? This past week has been a huge blur. Yesterday 2 more of my babies were born - back to back as we say. In case anyone has lost count - these were babies # 9 and # 10 in the last 27 days! Baby #9 is a perfect BIG baby boy - 10 lbs 4!! - to warrior mommy who worked very hard to bring her first child into the world. Every struggle was absolutely worth it and mommy and son are doing very well. Baby #10 is a beautiful baby girl - 7 lbs 8 - a beautiful butter birth! She's welcomed by her big sister and 3 big brothers! I finally to bed this morning at 1:30 am after 43 hours of no sleep and non-stop work!
Jax would be baby #9. By the way, a "butter birth" is an easy birth, according to a midwife. Also, I had no idea until I read this post yesterday, that she hadn't slept for 43 hours. She is amazing.
When my mom arrived in our birth room, she asked Robin how I was doing. Robin calmly answered, "I think it's harder than she expected it to be." It was.
I've thought a lot about what women say about natural birth being empowering. When they accomplished it, how it changed their self-perception. For some with a prior negative experience (often a unexpected cesarean or a vaginal delivery that ended with a lot of unexpected interventions), a subsequent natural birth is a healing experience for them. One friend said she was able to realize that she wasn't broken. Some women who have been sexually abused, find vaginal birth brings them emotional and mental healing, as the abused parts of their body experience something so joyful and right. That's powerful stuff. Another quote I've read is that women have a secret. And it's not that birth is painful; it's that women are strong.
For me, I've seen so many beautiful births, and seen so many different women "do it" who didn't think they "could", that in a way, I knew I could. I doubted it many times during my pregnancy. What if I couldn't do it? But I had the privilege of seeing so many women overcome, press through, and with excellent midwifery care, have healthy, safe home births, I knew it was possible for me too.
No, I had no idea how painful it would be, since every woman experiences labor differently. And I didn't know how long it would take. It was more painful, but took less time, than I was expecting.
But re-reading my birth story four months later, I ask myself, "Wow, was it really that bad? I don't think it was that bad." I know it was, or I wouldn't have written it that way, but I've already forgotten, sort of.
I didn't choose home birth because I wanted to prove something to myself. Or because I needed emotional healing. Or because I wanted to feel empowered. I chose it because it is the safest way for a low-risk pregnancy to complete.
This excellent article analyzes multiple studies investigating the safety of home births for low-risk women. It discusses the "what if something happens" question, which is what most people ask when they hear you are having a home birth. It reviews multiple studies, and concludes that professionally-attended home birth, following professional prenatal care, is SAFER for low-risk women and babies than hospital birth.
On a note that isn't my soap box, I'm glad we took Bradley Birthing classes. They were NOT enough to get me through labor peacefully - my mom (acting as my doula) counting my breathing with me did that - but they did provide education. They definitely gave my husband peace, because he knew what to expect. He was never afraid or out of sorts during my labor the way I've seen some other husbands who didn't know what to expect, or what to do to help. That alone was worth it. The connection with other couples desiring to have natural births as well, whether home or birth center or hospital, was also encouraging, since you get so much flack for having a home birth.
It's funny, really. Because the U.S., with our huge rate of hospital births as compared to home births, ranks 29th in the world for maternal and neonatal fatalities surrounding birth. The countries losing the fewest mommies and babies have the greatest percentage of babies (nearly 30%) delivered at home by professional midwives.
Back to the birth of Jax. Do I feel empowered? In a way. More so, I feel connected to women who have birthed babies, in any fashion, in any location. The experience of carrying a child, then bringing him into the world, is truly indescribable. I feel more connected to my mom, to my sisters, who have shared this breathtaking experience.
I do feel proud. Proud because women are strong. Because I am strong. Because mainstream America doubts that we can do it. Doubts that our bodies are strong enough. And we are stronger than the doctors believe. They do cesareans now if they think your baby is over eight pounds, because it might be too big for you to push out. Really? Tell that to the moms I know who have delivered eleven pound babies at home. Tell that to me, after I delivered a 10.4 lb first born. They told that to one of my petite friends who didn't get to push her first born baby out after 20 plus hours of induced labor. She's since had three amazing home births.
Women are strong, and we need to believe in ourselves. We need America to believe in us. To learn to treat birth as something beautiful, amazing, and DO-able. No matter how you choose to deliver, I believe it should be something supported by knowledge and strength, not fear. I wish we could eradicate the fear that plagues obstetrics.
Everywhere I go, when people comment on how big Jax is, I say how big he was at birth, and I say that I delivered him at home. And I say that it was amazing. Because it was.
What day is it today?? This past week has been a huge blur. Yesterday 2 more of my babies were born - back to back as we say. In case anyone has lost count - these were babies # 9 and # 10 in the last 27 days! Baby #9 is a perfect BIG baby boy - 10 lbs 4!! - to warrior mommy who worked very hard to bring her first child into the world. Every struggle was absolutely worth it and mommy and son are doing very well. Baby #10 is a beautiful baby girl - 7 lbs 8 - a beautiful butter birth! She's welcomed by her big sister and 3 big brothers! I finally to bed this morning at 1:30 am after 43 hours of no sleep and non-stop work!
Jax would be baby #9. By the way, a "butter birth" is an easy birth, according to a midwife. Also, I had no idea until I read this post yesterday, that she hadn't slept for 43 hours. She is amazing.
When my mom arrived in our birth room, she asked Robin how I was doing. Robin calmly answered, "I think it's harder than she expected it to be." It was.
I've thought a lot about what women say about natural birth being empowering. When they accomplished it, how it changed their self-perception. For some with a prior negative experience (often a unexpected cesarean or a vaginal delivery that ended with a lot of unexpected interventions), a subsequent natural birth is a healing experience for them. One friend said she was able to realize that she wasn't broken. Some women who have been sexually abused, find vaginal birth brings them emotional and mental healing, as the abused parts of their body experience something so joyful and right. That's powerful stuff. Another quote I've read is that women have a secret. And it's not that birth is painful; it's that women are strong.
For me, I've seen so many beautiful births, and seen so many different women "do it" who didn't think they "could", that in a way, I knew I could. I doubted it many times during my pregnancy. What if I couldn't do it? But I had the privilege of seeing so many women overcome, press through, and with excellent midwifery care, have healthy, safe home births, I knew it was possible for me too.
No, I had no idea how painful it would be, since every woman experiences labor differently. And I didn't know how long it would take. It was more painful, but took less time, than I was expecting.
But re-reading my birth story four months later, I ask myself, "Wow, was it really that bad? I don't think it was that bad." I know it was, or I wouldn't have written it that way, but I've already forgotten, sort of.
I didn't choose home birth because I wanted to prove something to myself. Or because I needed emotional healing. Or because I wanted to feel empowered. I chose it because it is the safest way for a low-risk pregnancy to complete.
This excellent article analyzes multiple studies investigating the safety of home births for low-risk women. It discusses the "what if something happens" question, which is what most people ask when they hear you are having a home birth. It reviews multiple studies, and concludes that professionally-attended home birth, following professional prenatal care, is SAFER for low-risk women and babies than hospital birth.
On a note that isn't my soap box, I'm glad we took Bradley Birthing classes. They were NOT enough to get me through labor peacefully - my mom (acting as my doula) counting my breathing with me did that - but they did provide education. They definitely gave my husband peace, because he knew what to expect. He was never afraid or out of sorts during my labor the way I've seen some other husbands who didn't know what to expect, or what to do to help. That alone was worth it. The connection with other couples desiring to have natural births as well, whether home or birth center or hospital, was also encouraging, since you get so much flack for having a home birth.
It's funny, really. Because the U.S., with our huge rate of hospital births as compared to home births, ranks 29th in the world for maternal and neonatal fatalities surrounding birth. The countries losing the fewest mommies and babies have the greatest percentage of babies (nearly 30%) delivered at home by professional midwives.
Back to the birth of Jax. Do I feel empowered? In a way. More so, I feel connected to women who have birthed babies, in any fashion, in any location. The experience of carrying a child, then bringing him into the world, is truly indescribable. I feel more connected to my mom, to my sisters, who have shared this breathtaking experience.
I do feel proud. Proud because women are strong. Because I am strong. Because mainstream America doubts that we can do it. Doubts that our bodies are strong enough. And we are stronger than the doctors believe. They do cesareans now if they think your baby is over eight pounds, because it might be too big for you to push out. Really? Tell that to the moms I know who have delivered eleven pound babies at home. Tell that to me, after I delivered a 10.4 lb first born. They told that to one of my petite friends who didn't get to push her first born baby out after 20 plus hours of induced labor. She's since had three amazing home births.
Women are strong, and we need to believe in ourselves. We need America to believe in us. To learn to treat birth as something beautiful, amazing, and DO-able. No matter how you choose to deliver, I believe it should be something supported by knowledge and strength, not fear. I wish we could eradicate the fear that plagues obstetrics.
Everywhere I go, when people comment on how big Jax is, I say how big he was at birth, and I say that I delivered him at home. And I say that it was amazing. Because it was.