I rarely watch movies these days. I've found that scenes of aggression, violence, sexuality, or discord in relationships often shake my roots a bit. I come away feeling like I'm a character too, and it takes a few days for me to feel like "myself" again. Most people I know seem desentized to this type of reaction, primarily because they watch lots of movies. I'm not really against movies, but I can't seem to shake how deeply they affect my visual memory, imagination, dreams, and emotional state of being.
Last night, upon the reccomendation of my mother, we watched Snow White and the Huntsman. It was way too much for me. It seemed like 60% war, 20% special effects generated from nightmares (bugs, leeches, dead things, blood, tar, snakes, etc.), 10% Kristin Stewart staring blankly, and 10% I-wish-I-was-a-good-plot story. Okay, there was some excellent acting from all the other lead characters. On the other hand, I really enjoyed Mirror Mirror, which had a much more interesting interpretation of the story, with some nice plot twists and plenty of humor and wit. (Although I'm comparing and action/drama to a PG Disney comedy, which isn't really fair).
I was so grateful that Jax woke up when the movie ended, and even happier to bring him into bed to cuddle with us the rest of the night, to help bring me back to my peaceful reality.
My life is so sweet and calm and simple most days, that I just don't like filling my eyes, mind, and heart with violence and ugliness. I prayed in tongues and took a calming remedy to help myself fall asleep. Then I watched my sweet son and my dear husband sleeping on the bed next to me, and slowly came back into myself.
In processing the lessons of the movie, I'm struck by evil queen's (played by Charlize Theron) infatuation with youth and beauty. While she takes her desire to be young and beautiful to tragic and horrific ends, her desire isn't far off from the one presented to women constantly. If we could steal the youth and beauty of another, to prolong our own, there might be many people willing to do so.
There she is, asking the mirror, who is the fairest one of all. And we do it too. When did this wrinkle form next to my eyes, across the corner of my mouth? Where did all these unruly grey hairs appear from?
At my work Christmas party this year, my boss's husband let me know that he didn't want any photos of himself taken this year. My husband and I take photos at this small gathering each year, and make them into a little photo album, at my boss's request. But he wanted to be left out. He said he just doesn't like the way photos of him turn out these days.
Now, I'm not one to have a thing for older men, but I can appreciate a good-looking face at any age. And I have to say, this white-haired, ruddy-faced man in his sixties, is handsome. If I was a man, I'd want to look that good at his age. If I was his wife, I'd be proud to say I caught this good-looking guy who has aged so handsomely. But he doesn't see it that way, clearly.
So who is the fairest one of all? Fairest according to who? If we're going to spend our lives expecting our faces to fall among the fairest of them all, we're going to be gravely disappointed in a couple decades.
Is our face the only thing we expect to reflect? What, or who, are we trying to reflect or be?
Shouldn't our mirror be Scripture? Shouldn't our goal be a pure and beautiful heart? When was the last time we looked at our Bible and asked God, "Does my heart reflect You?" "How can I make my spirit and my life and my words a truer reflection of Your beauty?"
Perhaps if we put half as much effort and time into the appearance of our heart, as the appearance of our face, we could be getting somewhere. Perhaps then, by the time our features have disappeared into a face full of stories, and we would be hard-pressed to be called "beautiful" or even "attractive", it wouldn't matter anymore. And perhaps our hearts would have become pliable to the Holy Spirit, that those around us could experience a beauty deeper and greater than anything we encounter in the grocery store check out. Perhaps we could be checking in the mirror of the Word of God, how are we coming along in our journey to become the fairest one of all. To let the Lord be our heart's mirror. To reflect Him.
Goodness, kindness, gentleness, peace, self-control....I have a long way to go folks. I'm not very fair. But I'm turning my heart to the right mirror, and working on my character to see it become just a little more beautiful to Jesus.
