Every Feb/March, our church does a corporate 40-day fast. It's always a time of refreshing and needed heart-change. This year, I'm struggling to stay consistent with the things I chose to fast from: casual internet use and unecessary spending.
It's hard because SOME internet use, including things like Facebook, is necessary for my business and personal life. I have clients and friends who don't have my email address or phone number, or just prefer to use Facebook instead of alternate mediums, to contact me. To completely fast from Facebook is comparable to not answering my phone for the next forty days. And while some people I know are doing so, I'm not prepared for that leap.
It's hard because spending SOME money, even some discretionary money, is necessary. Jax's first birthday is coming up, and his party is approaching. While my budget is small, there is still going to be a party. Which parts of the party supplies are necessary, and which are discretionary? I received some money for my birthday. Do I need to wait to spend it, or does it "not count" because the funds were a gift, not from our wallet.
And this is the story of the Christian life. We serve and love God, but not always. We treat others kindly most of the time, but not when they get us riled up. I think that's the point. We need God's help. He didn't create a life where we sign at the dotted line and become perfect people. (although that would have made things much easier). It wasn't meant to be easy. We weren't meant to be able to do it on our own.
We need His help. We need truth (Scripture) to saturate us. We need to surround ourselves with a community who join us in our journey to change.
Thus my (mostly) silence here on the blog. I didn't say I would fast from blogging, but I've slowed down, taken a break, put away the camera....gone to bed earlier, done more chores, finished our taxes, played games with Benjamin late into the night on Valentine's Day....
I have a backlog of outfit photos to post though, and I want to get them up before Jax turns one year (Sunday!), so all his not-yet-one photos are up before his now-I-am-one-digit photos.
Can it really be a year? What a blessed, joyful year it has been.
