We are born wanting to make a difference in the world. That force – God-given I believe – drives people to do many things. Feeling like we aren’t, or can’t, or won’t ever, make a difference, can be an ugly flip side of that motivator.
When I turned twenty-nine, I had a pretty miserable day. Several random unhappy things occurred (some nice ones too), and I was depressed about turning twenty-nine. Well, really, I was depressed that meant I would be turning thirty in short order.
In the grand scheme of things, thirty is a pretty youthful number, at least in the American lifespan. But it upset me to think about turning thirty, when so many things I had expected to accomplish in my twenties were yet undone. Some, with no horizon in sight of ever getting done.
So I wasn’t worried about aging. I was worried about making a difference. Upset that things I had dreamed of weren’t coming true. The world was passing me by – my life was passing me by – and I was missing what I thought I was meant to do.
After weeks of mental whining and moaning, I was suddenly startled with my own self-focus. My little pity-party was a bit obnoxious, even to myself (and I’m sure to my friends and family who had to hear about it). What an embarrassing little brat there was living inside my head!
“Because really,” I told myself,
“Think of all the starving people in the world, Joy!”
“Think of all the people suffering unspeakable tragedies!”
I became a little embarrassed of my self-pitying self. And I really did think about the starving people in the world.
If you didn’t watch the link above, you should. My jaw was on the floor, and my heart was bursting, watching these families scooping buckets of MUD out of a pit in the ground. They would carry this water for miles, hours, each day, sometimes more than six hours daily, to bring to their families - not water - but sludge. Then I saw their version of a hospital, accessible to 30,000 surrounding villagers, serving the same sludge to their patients. Using it to wash their sheets and medical instruments.
At that moment, I knew how to end my pity party. I wanted to make a difference for people like that.
And I’m proud to say, thanks to so many amazing people in my life, we successfully raised $5,000 in three months. That $5,000 goes directly to water projects, due to Charity: Water’s unique fundraising model.
My birthday wish was to make a difference. To know I wasn’t getting old without leaving a legacy. With a little moisture in my eyes as I write, I want to say, I think my wish came true.
They say the best way to get out of a bad mood is to serve or give to someone else, freely.
I don’t believe we were designed to be happy. I believe we were designed to serve. But amazingly, thanks to Creator who knows all about sacrifice, when we serve, we discover real happiness. What a paradox.